Can’t take it anymore? Four steps to create Pockets of Sanity

On an occasional basis, such as vacations, this type of friction causes a stress that can be tolerated because it’s time limited. However, when friction is endured on a continual, daily basis, the body can become overwhelmed with stress. Being overwhelmed with stress incessantly can harm the person both mentally and physically.

The Stress Response

Stress causes the body to release a very specific, well-organized cascade of hormones and modify physical functioning. This response is commonly called the “fight-or-flight” reaction. Fight-or-flight occurs to stressors that are life-threatening, such as a near-miss car accident, and non-life threatening, such as traffic or family arguments.

When stress is perceived, the eyes and/or ears send information to the amygdala in the brain. The amygdala is a small group of neurons at the base of the brain that helps with emotional processing. During the stress response, the amygdala will interpret the images and sounds it is being sent and instantly send a message to the hypothalamus if danger is detected.

The hypothalamus is another part of the brain that controls many hormones and the body’s involuntary body functions, such as breathing, blood pressure, heart beat, and the dilation or constriction of blood vessels and lung alveoli. The hypothalamus, through the autonomic nervous system, is the command center during stressful situations. When stimulated, the hypothalamus activates the sympathetic nervous system and causes a big burst of energy to take on the stressor. When the stressor has passed, the parasympathetic nervous system slows the system down again.

These changes by the amygdala and hypothalamus happen in a very coordinated and automatic way. Lots of times, the system is responding at the same time it is still gathering information. An example would be when you pull your hand away from a dangerous object even before you realize what is happening.

Consequences of a Continuous Stress Response

Current research has begun to reveal what happens when the body is continuously subjected to the stress response. Long-term exposure to stress effects both the physical and psychological health of a person. A sustained stress response has been linked to high blood pressure, clogged arteries, and brain changes that may contribute to anxiety, depression, and addiction. Similarly, new studies are linking stress to obesity through direct processes (i.e. stress eating) and indirect processes (impaired sleep and decreased exercise).

Not being able to find ways to slow down and escape from the stress response keeps the sympathetic nervous system activated way too long. After a while, the body can’t manage. Cortisol levels, a stress hormone, increase to try to rebuild the body’s energy stores that were used during the stress response. However, when the stress response is continuous, those cortisol levels can contribute to increased fat tissue and weight gain by triggering hunger.

Since the stress response is hard wired into our bodies as a survival mechanism, we cannot remove it. We can only learn to manage stress, especially when we live outside our home culture and are faced with stress every day. Finding Pockets of Sanity to relax and recharge can help you take control of stress and avoid the negative consequences of a prolonged stress response.

Techniques to create Pockets of Sanity

  1. Relaxation techniques have been found to be very helpful in lowering stress levels. It is not a complete fix, but can greatly reduce the level of stress being experienced.
    1. Examples: Deep abdominal breathing, prayer, visualization of a peaceful scene, a repetitive mantra or word.
    2. Difficulty: Easy. Can be done anywhere and at any time.
    3. How-to: Close your eyes to block out extra simulation and, if possible, block out sound with ear plugs, soothing music or white noise. Then begin by taking a deep breath. Inhale slowly and deeply through your nose and exhale slowly through your mouth. Relax your body with each breath. Prayer, a mantra, or visualization can be added at this time.
  2. Exercise is useful to burn off built up stress. Physical movement can help release the stress that occurs when something keeps rolling around your mind without being resolved. Exercise moves the blood around, gets the muscles moving, and increases deep breathing.
    1. Examples: Brisk walk, stretches, yoga, tai chi, running, dancing, etc.
    2. Difficulty: Easy to moderate. Can be done anywhere, but modified to the environment.
    3. How-to: If mobility is limited – stretch or put on some music and dance in place. If mobility is moderately limited – take a brisk walk around the block, the room, or location where you are. If mobility is not limited – put on some comfy clothes and practice a sport of choice or go for a long walk/run to sweat out the stress.
  3. Social support is great to help you avoid feeling alone. A listening ear can be a source of comfort and acceptance.
    1. Examples: Family, friends, soul mates, spouses, and/or companions
    2. Difficulty: Depends on the closeness of the relationship.
    3. How-to: Pick up the phone, Skype, text message, go out for coffee, ask someone for lunch, etc. Just get connected with someone. Don’t stay alone.
  4. Professional assistance is always justified when stress keeps you from doing the things you feel like doing. Sometimes it all just builds up and is too much for our limits. When this happens, seek professional help immediately. There is no shame in reaching out. None.
    1. Examples: Primary care physician, school nurse, psychologist, counselor, therapist, etc.
    2. Difficulty: Depends on resources available in your area. However, all health care plans should have mental health specialists and a contact number to call for assistance.
    3. How-to: Make an appointment with your health care provider and tell them that stress is keeping you from doing the things you want to do.

Or, if you don’t have a health care provider or feel insecure talking directly to them, call the phone number for client assistance on the back of your health insurance card. Call this number and ask to speak to a mental health specialist. Follow the instructions they give you.

In the end, stress is a part of life. The key is not to let stress take over your life. Understanding what stress is, how it can affect you, and some simply strategies for reducing stress can help you prevent the negative consequences that a prolonged stress response can cause. Recognizing that you have the power to seek out and use pockets of sanity to relax and recharge can set you up to have a healthy response to the stress you will encounter.

Knowledge is power

  • What new information did you learn from this posting?
  • Did it help you identify something in your family you would like to change?

Share your experience below and what steps you plan on taking to guide your family.


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About the instructor
Proactive Parenting
Deanna Marie Mason PhD
More than 20 years of clinical experience helping families:
Bachelor's Degree in Registered Nursing, Master’s Degree in Pediatric Nurse Practitioner and PhD in Nursing. University professor, patient education specialist, pediatric researcher, published author and reviewer to first-line international scientific journals, continuous philanthropic activity related to health promotion and education, wife and mother of two children.

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